I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
