I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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