I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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