no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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