This dress was meant to end up on your floor
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
