i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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