I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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