Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
