In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
