He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
