but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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