Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
