so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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