I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Randomize
