I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I'm like, not good at living.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Randomize
