some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
