I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Randomize
