dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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