awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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