so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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