whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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