What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
