Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize
