I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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