i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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