Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I fill condoms, not promises.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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