your parents love me but you hate me
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
