problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Randomize