Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
