3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
