You work out of a Hotel?
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
