people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
