come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
