i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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