could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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