does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize
