They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
