Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
