Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
