If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
