Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
My breath smells like gin and sadness
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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