"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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