How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
