so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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