I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
