Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Randomize
