just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
So vagazzling was a success
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I have post one night stand depression
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
