Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
