Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
