I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
